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I work a lot with relationships. It can be a very upsetting part of people's lives'. The is because sometimes, however hard we try, it's an area we cannot control.

This is because we cannot control others. The power we have lies in taking control of our actions, how we feel and our perception of what is happening. Relationships and dealing with other people can really trigger old emotions inside us and if we have any underlying unresolved problems it really magnifies them. 

It may be cliche but the single most important relationship you ever will have is with yourself. Self love is the key to any problems with relationship problems you may be experiencing. If you didn't see relationships being successful as you grew up or were surrounded by conflict you could be subconsciously seeking these things out now. If behaviours happen fuelled by this part of the mind we are unaware of them. 

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You can identify some of your beliefs by just asking yourself what love and relationships mean to you. Many people believe already that love is painful and relationships are hard work. This is already setting yourself up for failure. We need to change your beliefs about love and also your ability to find love. You may say to yourself 'I'm too old to meet someone' or think you aren't attractive enough. These are just limited thoughts which stop you from finding the person who is really right for you. Part of this process is really believing that you will.

 

If you are in a relationship already we need to identify what the main issue is. It usually has nothing to do with any little fights, just signs of conflict going on at a deeper level between the two of you. Relationships are all about compromise and bringing out the best in each other and if that is not happening for some reason we find and fill in those cracks.

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​To see others who have overcome similar issues click here.

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